This summer, I have 7 weddings. For 7 very different, incredible couples. I’m surrounded by married couples, engaged couples, and dating couples. I just got out of a 2 year relationship with a really incredible guy. But as I look back, as I reflect on that two years, I start to notice one area we failed in miserably, and I see it happening all around me.
We failed to slow down. We failed to pause and realize how young we were. Maybe it’s the Christian community we were surrounded by or maybe we were just smitten; but somehow we failed to pause.
When you like someone and can see a future with them, it’s so easy to jump to talk about marriage. Don’t give in to that temptation until you truly mean it. Until it’s time to be engaged. Take time to really get to know each other. Know how the other person ticks. Know what makes them happy, what makes them sad. Know how to fight and how to make up. Learn to listen and to say you’re sorry.
When you find your person, don’t let them go. But not letting them go, doesn’t necessarily mean marriage tomorrow. Not letting them go means to love them through the season you’re in.
I watch so many people my age talk about marriage too young. I watch them get engaged too quick. I’m fearful that they don’t truly know who the person is that they’re marrying. Maybe I’m just a passerby who doesn’t truly know their relationship.
I just think it’s so important to know your person. Not to rush things. Get married when it’s your season to get married. Don’t let the world pressure you to make that commitment. There is no timeline to follow. But be ready for the commitment you’re making.
Understand that marriage isn’t a wedding. Marriage isn’t one day; it’s your life. Marriage is sacrifice. It’s forgiving a broken person when they hurt you. It’s going on adventures and making memories together. It’s putting your person first before your friends. The world tells us marriage is our wedding but marriage isn’t a one day commitment. It’s a forever commitment; a covenant made between you, your person, and God.
So my dear friends, don’t rush. Don’t move too quick. Don’t let the world tell you that it’s time. It’s only time when you’re ready for what marriage truly is. When you know you’ve found your person and you can’t live another day without sacrificing everything you are, and everything you have for the happiness of the person you adventure with.
Slow down. Your time will come. Trust in the Lord’s perfect timing. He’s got you.